Today marks 6 months since Christian was diagnosed. So as I sit in this oh so familiar and uncomfortable pull out couch , I remember 2 doors down where Christian was diagnosed and my world came to a stand still.
I know we still have a long road ahead of us ( 2 more years and 10 months ) but I need to reflect on how much he has surpassed all of his doctor's "so far, so good(s)". . Let me explain ...
His doctor makes me laugh.. He has an accent that I still can't figure out - Romanian, Swedish - not quite sure ; but by the time I'm done speaking with him I am saying his catch phrases and have acquired an accent. I really don't mean to but it never fails! I say what he says like "very well" instead of good bye and "so far so good" and "ok, we'll see how that goes"
I'm laughing about this now after 6 months because I know he is such a good doctor and wants the best for Christian but at first I was thinking "wtf do you mean "so far , so good!"
And throwing F bombs as I saw fit .
I actually made him smile and laugh today "HA HA HA " ( yes with an accent, head back and just like that HA HA HA ! )
If you know anything about me , You know corny things like that make me laugh and I couldn't stop laughing for hours after.
On a more serious / reality / has to be said - note:
My sons childhood has been taken away from him, his innocence has been altered no matter how much I want to deny it. His baby hair has quickly became chemo hair which smells like motor oil and its no longer that fine baby hair we so want to preserve before the first cut .
His attitude is atrocious at times but I need this fight in him to continue - so mommy picks her battles. There are many times that his good behavior surpass his not so good - so for this I am grateful.
He has a beautiful heart and such an old soul. The nurses here love him to pieces and are very amused with his ability to have all the ladies swarming around him with one arm on the door entrance holding himself up and the inner foot on his calf like a true rock star!! You ladies understand that stance I am talking about. The stance of working the room . I know he's going to be a heart breaker and will get his heart crushed a few times.
That's what I wish for him anyway.. To know love , to truly understand how to give love and to know who is deserving of his love. It's a simple wish really. Something that we take for granted or don't appreciate or see the meaning behind when growing up. Tomorrow is the beginning of the next 6 months and I pray for a smooth ride.